Seek the beauty.

“Young writers should read books past bedtime and write things down when they are supposed to be doing something else.” 

I should definitely still be studying, but then this quote came to mind and I figured what would jotting a few thoughts down hurt? 

I am writing via McKenzie Park this afternoon.  My sweet roommate decided that going to the park would be the only appropriate thing to do with her afternoon considering it's a glorious 65 degrees outside, so I decided she was right and that I would tag along.  As we were leaving our apartment it looked like the two of us were headed off to a camping trip: backpacks, fold out chair, hammock, nalgene, strawberries and popcorn. 

Lubbock is not pretty guys, like not even a little bit.  Maybe when it snows it’s pretty and in the fall when you’re surrounded by a few of the ten trees this city has it shines a little, but not much.  As I was sitting here studying I looked up to admire the pretty pond in front of me and I thought, “Man this is gorgeous!”  In that moment there was nothing sweeter than this view…

To you it looks like a blue sky, a small pond, a few trees and a there is an ugly grey truck in the background that completely throws the picture off.  But what you don’t see is the completely content feeling in my heart.  What you don’t see is my best friend hanging in a hammock behind me reading a book.  What you don’t see is the constant, light breeze that is gently blowing my hair in front of my eyes.  What you don’t see is that about every three minutes that cool breeze turns into a warm breeze that has my heart beating at all different speeds. 

I believe that the Lord has given me a heart that always strives to seek out the beauty.  Sometimes seeking out the beauty in things leaves me disappointed, but I would rather have the heart I have than a heart that sits here and sees only the brown grass, that hears only the loud ducks and smells only the light stench.  Today is a gift and even though our society is teaching us to view life with an ugly lens I will not conform. 

I will seek the beauty.    

Just reading through my rhetoric book & they're talking about Jesus for like 3 whole pages!  

Popcorn in a zip lock bag, for the win!

Hannah's new patty backpack that she loves!  

yes more and no less!

Once upon a time I declared January 20th, or so, as national ditch your New Years resolution day.  There is something about working really hard at something for 20 days and feeling like that was the best you could do, so you get over it and move onto the next thing.  Lucky for me, in the world of Heather, I'm always coming up with something else I would like to get done during the year.  Maybe that's not SUCH a bad problem to have.

So this past weekend I came up with a NEW new years resolution: say yes more and no less!  I recently talked about fun lacking in my life, so how I plan on solving that is through saying yes to fun opportunities more than saying no to them.  You know where this new little phrase got me this past weekend? KANSAS CITY, MO.  That's right people, I said yes to driving 21 hours (1200 miles) in 3 days and boy was it so worth it.

Myself and 3 of the most entertaining girls drove FOREVER to visit our sweet friend Haley in KCMO! Cold weather, Thrift Shop, Christ centered conversations, Thrift Shop, dancing, Thrift Shop, Vampire Diaries, Thrift Shop, food, Thrift Shop, Silver Linings Playbook, Thrift Shop, lots of laughs, Thrift Shop, Patriots game and even more Thrift Shop filled 2 complete days of awesome.

Don't cheat yourself out of living a fun life.  Say yes more and no less!
 
I had so much more I wanted to say, but for some reason my creative juices start running at late hours and I also just wrote a 3 and half page paper and I'm afraid if I go on much longer I'll end up going on a tangent about feminism and gender equality and nobody wants to hear that, so…

I took all of 15 pictures this weekend and I am kicking myself for it, but here is one of me and my darling Caroline!  I love this girls heart.  

Cheers to adventure and love and life and beauty and music and friends and everything else that is making this heart of mine beat a million miles an hour this evening :) 

Cliches.

I hate cliches, because once something becomes a cliche the beauty that the phrase or action holds looses all its special points.  It becomes another face in a crowd of people and that's just a tragedy. 

Tonight has been somewhat of a somber evening; lots of not moving, staring at the celling, thinking and MAYBE a few tears.  Not so sure where they came from but somewhere between admiring Anne Hathaway's elegance and yelling at the TV when Zooey D didn't win her award I got a little mopey.  I truly don't understand how my mind works, like at all, it makes ZERO sense, then when emotions get involved there's a whole lot of pep talking myself out of my funk, trying to figure out why I'm even in a funk, then I pick myself up and decide that I'm probably one of the more pathetic people I know.  Girls you can relate, right?  I mean if I really am alone on this then I guess that's fine too…

One of the few things I pondered while staring at my celling was the way I've been living a not so joyful life recently.  I'm not so sure I like the way things are right now; I don't have as much fun as I think I should, I worry way too much, I over analyze, dwell on things that are just not important at all and who's got time for all this ugly to take up room in an unbelievably beautiful life?  I did; I made time and space for the ugly and that's a bigger tragedy than perfectly perfect words getting lost in a sea of other perfectly perfect words.  So while I played catch-the-propeller-on-my-fan-with-my-eyes I got really mad at myself for allowing so much negativity into my fairly positive mind, and in that moment I heard the Lord whisper a cliche in my ear: 

"Do the things you love and surround yourself with the people who TRULY treasure you."  

My New Years resolution was to set aside time to specifically pray for what the Lord wants me to do with my life.  I will be graduating in a year and a half and all I know is that I want to live in the mountains of Colorado.  I've been stressed and annoyed with myself because my dream is Colorado, it isn't to be a doctor or a lawyer or a teacher or a veterinarian!  However I need to have a career and I do dream of being successful but living in the mountains isn't going to make me money, so then we're back at square one; pleading with the Lord, telling Him that He needs to give me SOMETHING to work with.  

"Do the things you love and surround yourself with the people who TRULY treasure you."

We've all been told to do these things, but tonight these perfectly perfect words found a cozy place in my soul and I'm gonna let them stay a while.  I will not let this phrase lose it's special points!  

So what does this even REALLY mean?  That was the next trail my mind decided to wonder down. 

I'm ridiculously passionate about a lot of different things: people, writing, the Lord, art (in all it's forms), theories, photography, dogs and… and… and… 

I also have a list of people who love me so much and care deeply about me.  These are people who have such a deep respect for me and genuinely care about my heart.  

Whoop there it is, that's what I'm going to do until the Lord whispers another cliche in my ear: I'm going to do the things I love and I'm going to surround myself with the people who TRULY treasure me.  

Oh and I also just spent the most amazing month at home with my family and those are 4 people that I know treasure me and love me unconditionally, these are 2 of them.  Only the most precious brother and sister a girl could have.  

The 5 senses of Christmas!

Just a little FYI, as I write this I want you all to be aware of the pants I am wearing.  They are some comfy Christmas pajama bottoms that I'm not sure I have words for.  Just imagine patches of different colored snowflakes, we've got some polk-a-dots, a little red ribbon and a whole lot of greens and reds.  They are rather embarrassing, but at some point I thought they were a solid gift so I'll sport them on this eve of Christmas eve.  

So my family is HUGE on traditions and I guess I can take about 80% of the blame for making us that way (if we do something once, I insist we do it again the next year, the EXACT same way).  

The eve of Christmas Eve is the night my family piles in a car, Trevor in the trunk, and we drive around listening to our favorite Christmas CD (Hilary Duff, of course) and look at Christmas lights.  We then come home and watch A Charlie Brown Christmas, that's what we're doing right now.  We're all sprawled out on the couch in the media room, enjoying homemade creme brulee!  All is right in the world. 

I wanted to share the 5 senses of Christmas, according to me!  

When I think of Christmas, this is what I expect to see:

Lots of wrapping paper, ribbon and tissue paper.  Wrapping is an art form here at the Huante's house.  

Along with al those wrapping goodies the way my house is decorated is what Chritmas looks like to me.  This view gives me the warm in fuzzies in a way that nothing else can. 

This is what Christmas tastes like:

Mom's cheddar potato soup.  One of our many traditions is eating this delicious soup & finger sandwiches for dinner on Christmas Eve.  Mom made a huge pot today so we'll get to eat it tomorrow night, then the next and the next, until all that cheesy goodness is gone. 

This is what Christmas smells like:  Mom's toffee.  This is my most favorite thing about Christmas time.  Mom probably makes somewhere between 8 and 10 batches a year.  This stuff is indescribable.  Just imagine a pound of butter, 2 cups of sugar, pecans and a whole crap load of chocolate all put into one.  Making this stuff requires a special touch and my mom has it!  I cannot remember a Christmas that she wasn't making this stuff.  The smell is wonderful, it lingers throughout our whole house for hours after she makes it (she made a batch about an hour ago and the smell is stuck in my nose).

(This was taken before all the chocolate was spread.  HOLY YUMM!) 

This is what Christmas sounds like:  Hilary Duff, Disney Christmas, Aly & Aj.  Go ahead, laugh.  We laugh too, but these albums are TRADITION.  We jam to these for a month straight, put them in a drawer when Christmas is over then pull them out 11 months later.  

This is what Christmas feels like (substituting for touch, because what is a "touch" of Christmas supposed to mean anyway):  Peace, joy, love.  This picture was taking a few days ago when my family went to downtown Fort Worth to walk around.  Being surrounded by these crazy fools is exactly what Christmas feels like.  We all turn into 5 year olds during this time of the year, hints the Hilary Duff Christmas CD.  I love these people!!

Well friends I'm going to go enjoy the rest of A Charlie Brown Christmas with those crazy kids pictured above.  I hope you all have the most Merry of Christmas' :) 

HAHAHA before we made our way upstairs to start this movie my dad snagged this photo of me blogging!  Check out the pants.  Festive, huh?  

Grandma's & shopping.

On a day to day basis my favorite kind of people are parents.  The way they love, the way they cook, the way they want to be apart of every aspect of my life.  It's cute, really.  But on a day I get to spend time with either of my Grandma's, grandma's are my favorite kind of people.  

This woman's name is Nana and she is British.  This lovely lady was raised in Manchester, England then moved to the States when she met my Grandaddy.  It's a great love story, but maybe it's only great to me because they're part of my story too.  Rather than boring you with the sweet details of how he had to ask her to marry him 3 times & move across the world so they could build a life together or the beautiful story I've heard 736 times (approximately) about how she waited under the clock tower in Germany for him I'll go ahead and move onto why she is the most precious lady on planet Earth.  She probably beats out all the Nana's on Mars and Jupiter too, but really I can only speak for this planet.  She drinks tea almost every afternoon.  TEA.  Because she's BRITISH.  She appreciates every single second of the day and all of the little adventures that come along with being 88 years old.  We went and visited Nana in her adorable retirement home last weekend & we brought Christmas with us.  We brought her a few presents, but before she unwrapped them she hugged them!! She then peeled off all the wrapping paper with such technique leaving the paper completely intact.  The way this woman appreciates life is BEAUTIFUL.  The way she loves is BEAUTIFUL.  The way she gives so generously is BEAUTIFUL.  In this picture Nana was sharing old photos with me.  We went through about 4 albums.  My dad and her told stories about my Grandaddy that I never got to meet.  In one of those albums was a picture taken by him of JFK the day before he was shot (HOOOOOWWWWW COOOOOOOL!!!!!!).  He was a professional photographer for the the government!!  I can only dream to be as cool as him, or my Nana.  You can learn a lot from your grandparents.  Lots of old wisdom that can only be given by such sweet souls.  

Now this is Grandma and she is as cute as a button.  She told me she loves reading my blogs so here's you're little shout-out Grandma!  I am blessed by this woman's love.  We ventured to Grandbury yesterday for a little shopping day.  We spent a good two hours at BABES (!!!!!!!!!!!!!) talking about love languages (my favorite topic for any conversation) and such.  We then walked and talked and walked and talked and she stressed out about buying the perfect Christmas presents for everyone.  Shannon & I played dress up then took a fat nap in the car on the drive home.  

Grandma's, they're the sweetest, cutest, most lovely people and although I'm a little bias, these are two of the greatest this worlds got! 

Just a few pictures from our shopping day: 

I realize this is only half of Shannon's face, but I LOVE this picture.

Remember those RIDICULOUS popcorn shirts from forever ago?  Confession:  I always wanted one.  Thank you Mom & Dad for never following through with my requests of owning one of these… shirts that fit anyone.  

This is our attempt at a sorority girl pose.  Nailed it? 

Written on a whim.

Well my plan of being asleep by 8:15 tonight has been shot.  First it was, oh I'll watch one episode of Vampire Diaries (guilty pleasure, sorry I'm not sorry), then I decided that re listening to the Song of Solomon podcast by Ben Stuart (YOU ARE NOT ALOUD TO DIE IF YOU HAVEN'T LISTENED TO THEM) was a good idea, then my roommate sent me the link to a blog filled with super great inspiration, now it's almost 11.  

So I write, a lot.  Like I consistently write in 3 separate journals.  They each serve a different purpose.  Then I have this nifty thing, it's pretty censored, but it's stuff I'm comfortable sharing with everybody, rather than just Jenny, God or myself.  Moving onto the point…

There are an infinite amount of dreams running through my mind write now and I planned on writing them all down, but I'll let you guys in on this stuff.  I'm just going to go ahead and throw all these dreams that have consumed my mind all over you guys.  I have no idea where this is going to go, but if it pops in my mind I promise to type it out.  On your mark, get set, go!  

Snuggly dogs, like the kind that will sleep with me every night.  But not just dogs, big dogs, that have lots of fur & the ability to love me for as long as they live.

  

Dark hair and blue eyes, swoon.  

Those horrible hair days that turn into great hair days with the use of a curling iron & a few bobby pins.    Wow, thank you hair gods for the art of a messy bun. 

A colorful, maybe like a sea-foam green, shirt with a great vest over it.  Add some jeans & appropriate boots.  Bring a picnic basket & I'll bring the wine I'm not allowed to drink yet.  We'll hike that mountain over there, bring our cameras & that big cuddly dog I promised to love forever & we'll have the best day of our life.  

Hearing songs that I wish were written for me, but they weren't so I go ahead and pretend they are.  Then I get goosebumps pretending someone really thinks I'm as great as the person being sung about.  Music, there are no words.  

Taking a photo that I'm REALLY proud of.  Like show everyone I know, proud of.  Like the lighting is perfect, the back drop is out of focus & the forefront is pristine.  It maybe off centered, but the perfect kind of off centered.  

Thinking about something that happened once upon a time & it made me smile so big remembering it that I actually turn into a piece of walking cheese.  We're talking the hard cheddar cheese kind of cheese here people.  This smile is taking over my face.  

Finally getting to wear THE outfit I've been thinking about since the moment I bought the shirt that would go perfect with the pants & the boots, but the weather doesn't agree with the outfit and the appropriate occasion hasn't presented itself yet. I'll try it on, altogether, several times waiting for THE day of all days.  Well now it's here, so I put it on, question myself, but then decide it's perfect. I walk out of the house with confidence & darn right I rock that outfit all day long!  

Mountains.  You guys may think I'm kidding when I say I think about the mountains all day everyday, but I'm not.  I've got the perfect little house in mind; the windows will be old, the floors will be tattered, the fireplace will be perfect.  Apple cider and a good book by Kristin Hannah with my big 'ole dog  sitting at my feet.  

Children with beautiful, big, brown eyes filled with the most pure kind of innocence. 

People that are kind.  Genuine lovers.  Sincere and considerate.  These people have desires and they have dreams and they want to share all of them with me.  I hang onto every word they say because every word they speak is of truth and purity.  They are kind and they dream.  They dream big dreams.  Kind, kind, kind.  Hearts that are kind.  They love me and I love them.  Conversation with purpose.  Kind friends that dream.  

Quotes are my soul food.  

Butterflies.  It's the idea of uncertainty and nervousness, but it's happening in my stomach?  Sometimes those darn things flutter all the way up to my throat.  Honestly though, all it takes is a hug from my roommate, the anticipation before asking a question, opening the door to my apartment to the smell of my favorite candle to bring those things to life.  They fly high and often around here.

My dreams are my hope and my hope is my future and my future is lying in the palm of the One who placed those dreams in my heart years ago.  Circle of life people, circle of love and dreams.  I have so much I am so excited about experiencing and conquering.  Patience and persistence will pay off.  Hard work will pay off.  

I will go to the ends of the Earth with my dog, my dark hair & blue eyes, my perfect-bad hair days, the best days of my life, my songs, my perfect photo, my hard cheddar cheese smile, that perfect outfit that is still hanging in my closet, the mountains with the windows and fireplace and books upon books, those beautiful children hand crafted by the Lord, the genuine lovers in my life, the quotes that awaken the butterflies and all that hope I have bottled up.  The patience and the love and the kindness and everything else, wow!  

My life is just getting starting.  Thank goodness!! 

Oh, baby.

This picture was taken the summer before my freshman year of college.  It was about 6:20 AM and I was in the back seat of my mothers van driving with my family to my favorite city on this planet; Crested Butte.  It popped up today when my photos were flipping through, so I went and looked at again.  I stared at it for something like 10 minutes and decided that the moment this photo was taken is a moment I will never, ever forget.  

Things I love:

Finding quotes that spill out everything I wish I could express.  I have a hard time putting words together, so finding my exact thoughts right in front of me, but written by someone else, blows my mind.  This has officially been my favorite quote since March:

"The road to happiness does not end with a ring on your finger. Glass slippers are tucked within the hearts of strong and amazing women who have romanced themselves with adventure of hope and assurance. I believe that where there is hope, there is love. For the brokenhearted, there is healing. For the lonely, there is comfort. For the weary, there is rest. For the anguished, there is peace."

Clarensau.  The most beautiful music my ears ever have heard.  I've been obsessed since December of last year.  I play their songs at least twice a week & lucky for me their new album comes out on November 13th.  Go check them out. Dance With Me is my favorite and I plan on dancing to that song on my wedding day. Mhmmm, love. 

www.clarensau.virb.com 

My new space car that has a sunroof. 

Having a great group of best friends that I get to be reunited with in a week and a half.  These girls are my heart  & soul.  

Love.  I am thankful for love.