brumous.

Brumous (adj.): of grey skies and winter days; filled with heavy clouds or fog; relating to winter or cold, sunless weather

I LOVE THIS WORD.  I discovered it a few weeks ago and decided that it would probably be a good ten months before I could pull this one out of my pocket of intelligent sounding words, but today is the exact definition of brumous so I've been using it left and right.    

We are all aware that I love cold weather.  I love it so much that sometime I purposely don't wear a jacket just so I can embrace the sting of the piercing wind on my skin.  I'm not sure I have an answer for why I love the cold so much I just always have.  Maybe because the cold makes me feel vulnerable, in the sense that I need something other than myself to make me warm.  I cannot rely on my skin and bones or my heart or my knowledge or anything else that makes me who I am to make me warm.  I must resort to heavy jackets, longs socks, boots, apple cider, a fire or another person to keep the blood pumping to my heart.  Vulnerability is the state of being exposed and when I am walking from one side of campus to the other in 30 degree weather I feel completely exposed to the world; it can physically do anything to me it wants and I will allow it.  I cannot always rely on just myself to meet my needs.  Cold weather reminds me of that.

I like fog because it gives me an excuse to use my imagination.  There is not a Walmart behind that cloud, it is a forest of trees and beyond those trees are ice caped mountains.  During the summer of 2007 my family went on a European vacation and one of our many stops was to Edinburgh, Scotland.  We went on a tour of Edinburgh Castle and on this particular July afternoon the whole city was covered in a thick fog, so when I looked over the side of the castle I could not see all of the commercialism.  My dad can take credit for making me view the castle in a way that many other people couldn't.  He told me to imagine the city below us as it was when the castle was built in BC.  I loved putting my imagination to the test and because of it that was one of the most special experiences on that trip.  Today as I was driving I could only see 40 feet in front of me, so I reminded myself of that day in Scotland and decided that today I was going to use my imagination in the same way.  Right now I am looking out the window of my third floor apartment and I can see the houses and cars, but beyond that I am imagining a lake that is so close to being frozen, but because of the warm week we had it is not.  Surrounding the lake are massive pine trees and tall hills.  

As much as I love the winter, the world is dead.  Lucky for us in a few weeks it will be brought back to life with warm days and lots of colors.  Today is dark and gloomy, but we have bright and beautiful to look forward to.  It is guaranteed that there are better more beautiful things a few weeks away.  I will celebrate the fact that there is as much hope for my life as there is for this brumous day!  

This morning I woke up to a little bit of that colorful hope.  I am in love with this bouquet of flowers.  IN LOVE. 

 Lubbock's brumous' day.  Can you see the lake and pine trees? :) 

Seek the beauty.

“Young writers should read books past bedtime and write things down when they are supposed to be doing something else.” 

I should definitely still be studying, but then this quote came to mind and I figured what would jotting a few thoughts down hurt? 

I am writing via McKenzie Park this afternoon.  My sweet roommate decided that going to the park would be the only appropriate thing to do with her afternoon considering it's a glorious 65 degrees outside, so I decided she was right and that I would tag along.  As we were leaving our apartment it looked like the two of us were headed off to a camping trip: backpacks, fold out chair, hammock, nalgene, strawberries and popcorn. 

Lubbock is not pretty guys, like not even a little bit.  Maybe when it snows it’s pretty and in the fall when you’re surrounded by a few of the ten trees this city has it shines a little, but not much.  As I was sitting here studying I looked up to admire the pretty pond in front of me and I thought, “Man this is gorgeous!”  In that moment there was nothing sweeter than this view…

To you it looks like a blue sky, a small pond, a few trees and a there is an ugly grey truck in the background that completely throws the picture off.  But what you don’t see is the completely content feeling in my heart.  What you don’t see is my best friend hanging in a hammock behind me reading a book.  What you don’t see is the constant, light breeze that is gently blowing my hair in front of my eyes.  What you don’t see is that about every three minutes that cool breeze turns into a warm breeze that has my heart beating at all different speeds. 

I believe that the Lord has given me a heart that always strives to seek out the beauty.  Sometimes seeking out the beauty in things leaves me disappointed, but I would rather have the heart I have than a heart that sits here and sees only the brown grass, that hears only the loud ducks and smells only the light stench.  Today is a gift and even though our society is teaching us to view life with an ugly lens I will not conform. 

I will seek the beauty.    

Just reading through my rhetoric book & they're talking about Jesus for like 3 whole pages!  

Popcorn in a zip lock bag, for the win!

Hannah's new patty backpack that she loves!